SCRIPTS
Terms
undefined, object
copy deck
- HAVE YOU DECIDED WHAT YOU WANT?
- Not really. Id like to know...
- FINE, WHAT'LL BE?
- Im not sure. I was going to say Id like to hear about your specials
- WHY?
- why? Because I might like to have one?
- AND YOU WANT ME TO EXPLAIN THEM?
- well, since I dont know what they are and youre the only at this table who does, by process of elimination...
- I GET IT. TODAY'S SPECIALS ARE... FISH AND MEAT
- fish and meat?
- YOU NEED THAT DEFINED?
- no, Ive got a grasp of the basics, but you might want to fill me in on some of the details.
- LIKE WHAT?
- o i dont know. Maybe what kind of fish or what kind of meat
- My but you just want the moon, dont you? OK, we have white fish and red meat. Happy?
- ecstatic. Know what, just bring me a chinese Chicken salad, please
- If you wanted a Chicken chinese salad, why did you ask me about the specials
- I dont know I guess deep down Im just evil inside.
-
(aside)You wont get an argument from me
FINE, CHICKEN SALAD IT IS - Notes on patient Jane Bryant: Its apparent that Jane's anxiety stems from...
- Ahem do you think you can tear yourself away from your little recorder?
- Im sorry I didnt see you
- Of course you didnt. why would you? Im just the waitress. Im sure you have more important ppl to deal with.
- what can I do for you
- WE'RE ALL OUT OF CHICKEN. YOU CAN HAVE A CHINESE SALAD
- theres no such things as a chinese salad
- there is today
-
just bring me a club sandwich?
what? - YOU MIGHT TRY PLEASE. BRING ME A CLUB SANDWICH, PLEASE. IM YOUR WAITRESS, NOT YOUR SLAVE
- ok have I done something to offend you?
- what are you talking about?
- Since you first came over here you've been very angry about something and your taking it out on me.
- Thanks for the analysis. And what are you? A shrink
- Actually... I am a therapist
- Terrific. 75 tables here and I have to wait on Sigmund Freud
- thats enuf I want to talk to your manager
- Sure, talk to the manager. Get me fired. Prove to him that he is right.
- prove to who, what?
- My husband. He said this was a dead end job and that I was a loser.
- your husband said you were a loser?
- can you believe that? He never used to say that especially when I was working and putting him through podiatry school.
- your husband is a podiatrist?
- Yes he is. Why? Is something wrong with that. You have something against feet?
- no, not at all, I love feet. I use mine every day. They're very... handy. Get it? Feet...hand... it was a joke
- Really. I hope your a better therapist than you are a comedian
- Do you know your very hostile?
- Sigmund Freud and dick tracy. what gave it away?
- Fine, you're targeting your anger at the wrong person
- mabye, but your here, so that makes it at least convenient.
- not to mention counter-productive.
- what does that mean?
- you're allowing yourself to become a loser. It's simply a matter of self-loathing.
- you wanna say that in english
- bottom line you dont like yourself. period!
- (sits down) what am I supposed to do?
- dont you have other tables to wait on? other customers to abuse?
- forget them! what can I do?
- OK answer this do you like being a waitress?
- Yes. I love it
- Good...are you a good waiter and do you make a decent living?
- Im great at it and I can make a lot of money.
- if what you said is the truth, how can you be a loser and this be a dead end job?
-
you're right.
(gets up and voice rises)
Im a great waitress. In fact, im one of the best in town and anyone who disagrees with me can come here, get a table, sit down, order, and watch me! - thats great but you may want to keep this between us right now
- OK, ur right, but how do I prove this to my husband?
- what have we been talking about? you only have to prove it to yourself. Want to know how?
- Yes!
- ....say Hi there. how are you? nice day, isnt it? well, go ahead
- Oh, OK. Hi there. how are you? nice day isnt it?
- Now ask me what Id like. Go ahead
- What can I get for you sir? Can I tell you about the specials? See, I remembered that you asked me about the specials before.
- You are good.... now say, "it would be my pleasure" and go get it for me
- Sir, that would be my pleasure. I'll have it for you in a flash. I threw that in.
- Nice touch, now go get it
- now go get it!
- No, dont repeat it, do it!
- oh. You bet!
- zacsf